I more or less already quit blogging around April 2015 but I didn't want to leave for good without a last goodbye.
As this blog wasn't started until autumn 2014, I didn't really stick around for too long. The reason is even though my blog has always been small and even though I have found amazing and lovely people via their blogs, running my own blog and keeping updated with others' just gradually made me feel more and more pressure and forget about my offline life which - let's be honest - is all there really is (at least for me).
I felt a pressure to think about possible posts, I felt a pressure to do certain things so I could blog them, I felt a pressure to make people realise my blog is out there. And this just was anything but beneficial for my own well-being. I didn't really live my life the way I should have, I rarely enjoyed the moments just for what they were but was occupied by the thought of documenting them or - in moments that weren't meant to be documented - thinking about the ones I could document. I didn't really and actually live my life but was possessed by the idea of documenting it and getting my blog out there.
When I quit and I realised how good that was for me personally, I was actually troubled with remorse a lot of the time - I felt like I should blog, like I should want to do this as I had put so much effort into it and now I just let it slip away. But I also felt my posts would be completely shitty if they weren't honest and I really just didn't feel like writing anything so I didn't.As there are a few posts after April 2015, you can tell there were moments when I felt like writing again. But my content was different, I didn't really feel too comfortable with most of the things I'd written beforehand and I knew how much time of my life I had spent reading blogs just to keep updated instead of really enjoying it that I refrained from doing that again. I did write my most heartfelt and to me personally important post in September 2015 but I never really felt this need to put myself out there with a blog again. There are topics that I'd wish got more attention (which is mainly why I wrote the aforementioned post) but I also knew I didn't have the audience to do that myself and I knew I didn't want to produce the content anymore that I felt I could gain an audience with.
I am grateful for the people I virtually met by writing this blog and for the experiences I made but I think a lot of social media just aren't for me because they tend to influence my life too heavily. It's been a short but also lovely time on here having my very own place on the internet and I'm keeping it here as it is with a few posts that mean something to me or that I feel could help somebody who stumbles upon them in one way or the other but I think blogging just isn't really for me.
Lots of love
PS: And Sjoukje please don't be mad at me for never writing that Amsterdam post that I promised you!